My Theory on Backwards Time Travel

The laws of physics do not allow for backwards time travel. I know I know. What about Back to the Future, The Time Machine, Peggy Sue Got Married and Somewhere in Time, etc.? Yes, those were great movies but heavily flawed in the science and not to mention total fiction. Even today, some scientists still believe that one day time travel will be possible. It’s just a matter of figuring out the equation. Right? Einstein couldn’t prove it but if he was still alive today would he be any closer to the equation? I doubt it.

I’m no genius. Really. But I’ve given this time travel thing a lot of thought and I get the theory of bending space and worm holes – you know, all that shit no one can really prove. And, it used to make sense to me – well sort of anyway. How cool would it be to travel back in time and visit yourself and drop off some Cliff’s Notes on what’s ahead? Or travel back and bring forward evidence of any historical anomaly. Well, guess what? In order for that to happen, every living being would have to generate a duplicate self for that second in time.

So, let’s see: I would have roughly 5,387,400 duplicates of myself - and counting – locked in their individual second of time in a loop and never aging. If I was able to return to that second in history, not only would I see my selfs as I was for those seconds – one at a time of course, but then I would be generating more selfs for those same seconds I’ve already experienced. This is why time travel is not possible and will never be possible. I have only one self with one stream of consciousness. In fact, everyone just has one self.

My self began it’s life in 1969 and has lived day to day, hour to hour, second to second to get to this very point in time. There is no ‘back’ to return to because I am here in the present. The present is where we all live no matter if we’re asleep, fucked up, watching a movie, dead or eating dinner or pretending to be somewhere or someone else. And whose to say the self is duplicated every second. Maybe it’s supposed to happen every millisecond or microsecond. Regardless, the concept of time travel is ridiculous.

Lastly, the only thing that is infinite is time. Time keeps moving forward. But here is a thought: Is time only existing because humans defined it as so? The Earth is spinning while traveling in a circle around the Sun. That’s time – our time – human time.

Square Biz Teena Marie 1981

RIP Teena Marie aka Lady T. Teena had one of the most beautiful voices to grace R&B. This girl could blow and tear up a ballad. I already miss her. Thank you Teena for being you and making some of the most beautiful misic in my life.

Religion = Philosophy + Misogyny + Fantasy

I'm Screwd....And Not in a Good Way.

I'm tall. I'm 6 feet tall and have been since I was 14 years old. Being tall is great except for one thing: I have big feet. My feet have been a size 13 narrow since I was 12-ish years old. And what sucked was that back when I was a teenager, hardly anyone made shoes bigger than size 10. Thankfully, the shoe industry caught up and a few more designers began making size 13 narrow shoes that were cute but still fairly conservative. I was able to dress like a girl from head to toe. No worries, right? WRONG.

Present day: I've had two kids and have lost a lot of the baby weight. I pulled out my shoes from storage b/c I've been wearing Birkenstock for 4 years. To my horror, none of my girly shoes fit. My feet have grown and are a size 14. Who makes size 14 shoes for women? The makers that do make the ugliest shoes I've ever seen or add a 5" or 6" heel. What the fuck am I going to do? I'm being forced to shop for shoes like a transgender dude trying to live like a woman. I hate it. I wish I could make my own shoes but that's not gonna happen. Should I find a cobbler? There are no cobblers unless I find a local Amish community but then have you seen their shoes? How am I supposed to re-enter the work force? I can't walk into a job interview wearing 5" heels or flats that make my feet look like giant bananas. Luckily, I have a few years to figure this shit out.

Ask a Question and the Universe Delivers!

When I was very young, my parents divorced. My father had run off with a mega bitch that eventually became my step-monster and thus leaving me, my sister and mother to continue life as a broken family. I was 3 years old when I met the mega bitch step-monster and from day one she hated me and let me know it by being physically and mentally abusive. So I’ve wondered most of my life: How can an adult hate a 3 year old?

Presently, I baby-sit an almost one-year-old boy. I’m a stay at home mom anyway, so what’s one more kid in the house plus, I get to make a little extra much needed cash. Well, after seeing this child for over a month, I have a confession to make. I don’t like watching this extra child.

He’s well behaved and was easy to get onto a schedule. It’s not that I hate the child. I don’t. He’s a helpless baby. What I don’t like is that his parents don’t bathe him. They don’t clean his ears or his feet and hands. He’s a grubby little baby who enjoys sitting in his own shit – literally. I don’t like what his parents feed the baby either. He’ll be a 1 year old in less than a week and for lunches everyday he gets puree fruit and only a little of it. The poor kid shits 4 times a day and that’s only while he’s with me from 7:30am to 3pm.

Since the mother is younger than me, I let her know that the baby needs to eat veggies – green ones – everyday. She told me that he doesn’t like green veggies and that she knows what’s best for her baby because she is a pre-school teacher. So I dropped it. I sent my husband to the store to stock up on green veggie baby food. Now the boy gets green veggies for lunch Monday thru Friday. I don’t tell his mother that I’m feeding him green veggies – that he really loves by the way or that I have given him baths.

So what’s my problem? I still don’t care for this baby. I don’t like the way he looks, smells, or the sounds he makes which are reminiscent of the monster from the movie Funhouse or that everyday he shows up sneezing all over my kid’s toys. I have to decontaminate all the toys, highchair, floor mats – everything that kid comes in contact with I feel the need to clean. But do I hate him? No, not at all. I play with him, read to him, tickle him and even sing him to sleep. I feel bad for him because I don’t feel he has a chance at a healthy life. So why don’t I like this baby? I feel these things because his being in my home takes my attention away from my own children. I’m resentful.

So going back to my first question of how the mega bitch step-monster could hate a 3 year old has been answered. She resented me for having to share her time with my father. Moreover, her lack of intelligence and maturity limited her ability to communicate her frustration to my father so the only thing she could do was act out abusively like a big dumb animal. A year or so ago, I asked my father if the mega bitch step-monster had any remorse for the way she treated me. His reply, “Sherry feels you were treated fairly.” Fuck that bitch!

Autumn Bitchfest 2010

“Excuse me Ma’am: You were 4 and a half months pregnant and just miscarried into the toilet. What are you gonna do now?” “I’m going to Disneyland!”

Really? I know it’s the happiest place on Earth and maybe you want to be distracted from the devastation that just occurred the day before…but Disneyland? Personally, I would retreat to a quiet place and mourn the loss of my little darling that almost was especially if my doctor told me most of my adult life that I’d never have children of my own. But that’s me. I’d be a wreck strolling through Disneyland surrounded by other people’s happy little children because all I would do was think about my baby never experiencing Disneyland with me.

I’m sure we all react differently to tragic events. How many people thought after 9/11, “Let’s make a baby, Honey. Seeing all that death and destruction has put me in the mood to pro-create.” And thus we had the second baby boom. So, I’m not upset that the woman went to Disneyland just after losing her baby. I’m just surprised that she was able to do so and enjoy it.

House Hunting: For Renters Damnit!

One man's house for rent is usually a renter's shit hole. People have a lot of nerve trying to pass off meager, shabby homes for almost a down payment on a house. What the fuck! Just because of the influx of foreclosures in the Bay Area, landlords have decided to fuck all renters. I used to be able to get a single story house with 3 bedroom 2 baths at 1800 square feet in a nice quiet neighborhood for $1800. Now for $2000 a month I can have my choise of any 1100 square foot shit hole on any shabby street. What the fuck!

Saucey!

I'm totally reading this book!

I've Been Consumed!

I haven’t written or ranted in a while for one reason. I’ve been consumed with the Real Housewives series. Isn’t that sad? I know all about everyone but refuse to discuss anything with all but one friend because the shows are frivolous, dumb-dumb, junk. What I can’t get over is how Bravo exploits women who are clearly mentally ill. And, the women who are mentally deficient keep coming back for more. It’s difficult to watch but I want to bare witness to the disaster that is coming. Call me a history buff. How far is this reality bullshit thing going to go?

I lament the days of sit-coms, variety shows, gritty dramas and documentaries. I’m gonna have to start reading books again. I want to be entertained for God’s sake!

Time Unveils Truth...Eventually

One thing I know for sure and hold without doubt is that time heals physical wounds but does not heal emotional wounds.

The key to living a good life, which is living in the present, is using the ability to heal one’s own emotional wounds. You can’t ignore them and you can’t just say, “I forgive and forget.” You must process the action that caused the pain: Analyze it; figure out the why; connect it to your own actions or inactions; accept it; own it; then express your gratitude for the life lesson.

If you can’t figure your pain out then you will be forced to relive the pain over and over until you can figure it out. And don’t think for one second that death resolves anything. Life lessons continue for eternity because life is eternal and our bodies have nothing to do with that.

Censorship Sucks!

I’m incredibly disappointed in Comedy Central over-censoring the latest South Park episode. Every since 9/11 our American slogan has always been – Don’t change who we are or the terrorist win. Well, according to Comedy Central, the terrorists have won.

Now that Comedy Central has kowtowed to the muslim extremists, we can expect even more death threats on TV producers and even more censorship. Will other TV networks follow suit because of Comedy Central? I bet they do. All corporations are sheep and will follow the trends of other large corporation. Fear wins again and that SUCKS.

Someone needs to tell those extreme muslim American haters to FUCK OFF.

As for Comedy Central or I should say, VIACOM, they need to remember where the fuck they do their business (New York) and act like they understand and comply with the Constitution of the United States.

WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!

You may follow me but know that no good will come from it. You've been warned.

Quid Pro Quo

I am a big supporter when it comes to my friends and what they are doing professionally or artistically. I've been asked to proof read, give general feedback and quality assure various stuff they are producing for FREE. Each and every time, I jump at the chance to support and encourage them; however, I don't seem to get the same in return.

I wrote a movie script for the first time and when I was almost complete I began to talk about it. I NEVER asked anyone to read it except my husband. He read it and liked it a lot. Three other people begged me to read it and after some contemplation I agreed. I made it very clear that I wanted feedback no matter what good or bad. So this is what I got:

One person read the first 10 pages out of 116 and decided to bombard me with stupid questions instead of reading the rest of the story. He finally finished the script so he says but failed to let me know or even give me any feedback. All I got was, "When you decide to stop messing around and write a drama, let me know."

The other two people never read the script at all. I asked about it for a while then felt like I was beating the dead when I really wanted to beat the living.

I didn't write the script because I had nothing else better to do. I wrote it because I was asked to and honestly, I wanted to see if I could do it. This was my attempt to make money by actually doing something I went to school for.

Will I be sending any other writings to the same people for their opinion again? HELL FUCKING NO. Will I be going out of my way to support them on their endeavors? Wait for it...

Brave New World - Revisited!

Like most women, I am struggling with losing the baby weight. For some reason my body does not respond to my usual regimen like it did before I turned 40. Before, I could fast for 3 days and lose 5 to 10 pounds no problem. Last time I fasted for 3 day, I gained 2 pounds. My hormones are okay and my thyroid is fine so what's the difference?

I don't know.

So I am trying something more aggressive. I am entering the world of calorie restriction. Starting today, I am restricting my body to only 1200 calories a day. Also, I am doing this without the help from prescription drugs.

I accept the fact that I am no longer 'growing' or building muscle. I merely require enough nutrition to sustain a healthy life. So here it goes....

The Difference Between Republicans and Democrats

A. The dog represents Republicans and the rescuers represent the Democrats.

Someone’s dog got out of their backyard and ended up in an irrigation canal. The struggling dog, which is unable to climb out of the canal by itself, will surely drown if not rescued. The 911 operator dispatches a team of rescuers to the scene. A firefighter is tethered to the fire truck and slowly lowered into the fast moving waters of the canal. The dog is scared of the rescuer and tries desperately to avoid him. Fortunately, the rescuer is able to reach the dog, secure him and safely hoist him out of the canal but not without being severely bitten by the freaked out dog.

B. The authorities represent Republicans.

Someone’s dog got out of their backyard and ended up in an irrigation canal. The struggling dog, which is unable to climb out of the canal by itself, will surely drown if not rescued. The 911 operator dispatches the authorities to the scene. The authorities stand at the ledge of the canal with shotguns and semi automatic rifles. They aim and shoot at the dog struggling in the current. The dog is shot dead in the water. Afterwards, the authorities argue over whom they should hire to come out and retrieve the dead dog and sanitize the now contaminated irrigation canal that has been shut down and thus withholding precious water from most of the farms in the state.

During the months of private deliberations between the authorities and themselves, the authorities spend their off time flooding citizen email inboxes with tales about how the dog was a terrorist trained by Al Qaida; how the dog used to perform abortions on 12 year old girls without parental consent; how the dog was once owned by Osama bin Laden and used to help plant landmines to kill American solders; and how American senior citizens will have to eat the dead dog because the Democrats are using their benefits to pay off the farmers so that they can in turn pay their illegal immigrant workers.
Finally, the authorities select a corporation to do the clean up but now they must decide how to pay for it. Another month goes by and the authorities decide to “borrow” millions of dollars from the education budget to pay the corporation to remove the decomposing dog carcass, sanitize the canal, and subsidize the farmers for lost crops. In the end, the authorities decide to sue the Democrats in office for allowing private citizens, who live near canals, to own dogs.