The Truth About Why Females Go To College

After hearing so many accolades about the movie The Social Network, I added it to my Netflix queue and saw it a few days ago. My first impression was, “Wow, can these actors talk any faster?” I bet if everyone spoke at a regular tempo, the movie would have been 3 hours long. By midway through the movie, my excitement for the storyline turned to out-right disgust. The way the women were portrayed in that film was insulting to women. Out of the entire cast, there were only 2 females I saw who weren’t total slutty whores and of course they had very little screen time. So what’s the message here for the ladies?

When Aaron Sorkin, the screenplay writer of The Social Network, accepted his Golden Globe for best screenplay he had a message for his 9-year-old daughter. He said,

“Smart girls have more fun.”

So, the females he created in his story, who got into Harvard, were there only to fuck and suck their way through four years - for fun? Really? Sure, sex can be fun. I’ll admit the obvious but what I saw were a bunch of girls spreading their legs for any guy attending Harvard in hopes of becoming his wife. Yes, wife. Or maybe I was wrong and they were just fornicating to get pregnant so they could at least have some kind of income post graduation - if they even graduated at all.

I was reminded of my own journey through higher education. After earning my BA, I decided to enter the work force. I was horrified when the only jobs offered to me were as a receptionist. You know who else become receptionists? The girls who dropped out of high school. If only adults were more honest with me when I was younger. Instead of just harping me to go to college, no one ever said why except to “get a good paying job.” That was bullshit. Here is the truth of what should have been said to a female adolecent about to enter high school:

Go to college and fuck your way through the undergrad program in hopes of finding a husband because it will be him that gets the good paying job - not you. If you fail in four years, then get into a graduate program where you’ll have 18 more months to 2 years to continue your search. And when I say search, I mean more fucking and sucking and now faculty are no longer excluded. Lastly, if you fail again, your last hope is getting into a 6 year Ph.D. program and if you get that degree without a husband then maybe you can make some money writing books about finding your bliss or spiritual oneness. Good luck.

I thought the message from the movie was clear. Women are only as good as their genitalia but otherwise have nothing else to offer. Even a pretty face only last for so long. So time is of the essence! Fuck everybody - with money or money earning potential. And if you're just figuring this out and you're older than 28 - sorry bitch. Start hoarding cats.

I honestly think that maybe just maybe Harvard only accepts women based on their fuckable value - and how much money their parents have. I should have applied when I had the chance. I love rejection.

So when you look into the eyes of that 4th grade girl and ask her what she wants to be when she grows up. Ask the question properly with absolute honesty. Say, “What kind of whore do you want to be when you grow up?”