Religion = Philosophy + Misogyny + Fantasy

I'm Screwd....And Not in a Good Way.

I'm tall. I'm 6 feet tall and have been since I was 14 years old. Being tall is great except for one thing: I have big feet. My feet have been a size 13 narrow since I was 12-ish years old. And what sucked was that back when I was a teenager, hardly anyone made shoes bigger than size 10. Thankfully, the shoe industry caught up and a few more designers began making size 13 narrow shoes that were cute but still fairly conservative. I was able to dress like a girl from head to toe. No worries, right? WRONG.

Present day: I've had two kids and have lost a lot of the baby weight. I pulled out my shoes from storage b/c I've been wearing Birkenstock for 4 years. To my horror, none of my girly shoes fit. My feet have grown and are a size 14. Who makes size 14 shoes for women? The makers that do make the ugliest shoes I've ever seen or add a 5" or 6" heel. What the fuck am I going to do? I'm being forced to shop for shoes like a transgender dude trying to live like a woman. I hate it. I wish I could make my own shoes but that's not gonna happen. Should I find a cobbler? There are no cobblers unless I find a local Amish community but then have you seen their shoes? How am I supposed to re-enter the work force? I can't walk into a job interview wearing 5" heels or flats that make my feet look like giant bananas. Luckily, I have a few years to figure this shit out.